A fun thing is happening to me this holiday season, every time someone says "I am so stressed, I have to buy a present for..." I start giggling, not because they are stressed but because I love irony.  People rush around to buy things for various reasons, because they think they have to, to validate their love, to prove something to someone, and sometimes, because they really want to, while secretly hoping for the appreciation to pour their way.  The irony here is they are creating stress buying presents and totally not being present.

I know I am not the first person to recognize that the holidays have become so hectic, everyone is trying to rush through them to get to January and be done with them. I miss the wonder of the season when it was about decorating, seeing pretty lights, my mother's braided cinnamon bread (the irony here being I have probably been intolerant of gluten my whole life but MAN was it good!) and the sing along we did on Christmas Eve. I wonder when someones company became less important than the latest wish list.

I love giving gifts so I'm not suggesting we forgo that, to anyone under the age of 18, but that we bring some presence into the season. Perhaps we can each ask ourselves what really matters to us and be the teacher of time being precious, not stuff. Not one soul who comes through to me wishes for their stuff but there is always an appreciation of the sweetest memory. I appreciate that my friends and I do time together rather than exchange gifts. Dinner out or a movie or snuggling into the couch with a cup of coffee and catching up is soul food. It nourishes at a level that is hard to explain. It validates we are connected to others and it gives value to the effort that is necessary in any friendship. I'm very blessed to have friends who get this.

How could you be more present this year? Would you like to volunteer? Would you want to say no to a holiday party you didn't want to go to anyway and stay home in your jammies while starring at the lights and giving thanks for whatever you learned this year? Would you like to start a tradition that the family only buy for those that are under an age or height limit? I don't know about you but I don't want to receive a gift someone has stressed over buying. Think of the energy associated with that. blek.

Give yourself the gift of time this year. Set an intention, if it feels right to you, to forgo the pressure of the manic shopping and perhaps make a donation in your family's name to a cause you believe in. I did this one year when I was younger and I remember the surprise of people's reactions but then the appreciation of being part of something they had no clue about but felt so good. I didn't realize then what I was doing had so much meaning, I probably thought it got me out of shopping too, but I am grateful to be aware of it now.

I wish you the gift of being totally present in your own life and seeing the magic that can bring. Sparkles, glitter and miracles.

Blessings,

Vicki

www.vickibaird.com

How does it get to be the holidays so fast? It seems like one minute we are planning picnics and summer vacations and the next there are decorations out for December holidays in October. I know time doesn't exist on the other side but it seems to be flying on this side.

This year I have had a new perspective of the holiday season. I've never been a traditional gal. I don't get super excited to shop and trust me, cooking is never a woo hoo moment for me so planning a meal does not make me gleeful. I do love the music and the lights and the little kids excitement but the rest of it seems like too much fuss directed at acquiring more stuff and stressing us out. At some point this last year I decided I wanted experiences to be my gift to me this year. I can't say where it happened but I am glad I became aware that stuff couldn't make me happy, I had to do that myself!

I wonder if this perspective wouldn't help others enjoy the months of November and December and beyond! So often when someone says Happy Holidays (and yes, I am totally happy with this expression...it has happy in it!) they don't mean it. They may not even believe that a happy holiday season is possible. There may be so many stressors that they are only wishing to move past the time of holidays and get to a more normal schedule. Does this sound familiar? Do you want to fast forward past the parties and shopping and wrapping? Do you want to stay solvent in your energy as well as your wallet? Do you miss family members, either because they passed or because there is family tension and Happy Holidays seems nauseating?

What if you decided to take this holiday season like you would take a hairpin turn? What if you downshifted, held the wheel with confidence and trusted that you have come through other holiday seasons and you will this one too, with the added benefit of enjoying it too!

What if you decided that time with someone was worth more than any item you may have to dust? I don't want anyone stressing over what to give me. I want to see a smile. I want to hear you donated to a charity instead of buying me something, or I want to hear, Vicki, want to go to dinner and we will enjoy each others company AND eat out? (Remember, I don't cook!)

What if we slowed time down and realized the holidays are really for celebrating and honoring all of what we already have? If you take that corner too fast you may not stay on the road and risk a crash, but if you are conscious and take it with care, it will be exhilarating.

Try something new this year. Listen to you and really ask what you would like to do on a day of honoring. For Thanksgiving this year, I am thanking my body for supporting me this year and rather than stuffing my face I will be doing a race that raises money for enrichment programs. We will have a dinner with the kids at another time, but this is what I want to do this year and I am giving myself that gift as well as providing an example of authenticity. Traditions are important but how do new ones get started if we don't give ourselves permission to navigate those turns?

Whatever your holiday celebration is, I wish you the best of you and the time you get to spend with others. The saying is so true that we can't take items with us when we go, but I promise you, we take the connections we have made and we hold them dear. How we spend our time here matters when we are no longer physical, shouldn't it matter while we are?

Celebrating you in my life,

Vicki

www.vickibaird.com