When you think about it, if you think about it, our physical beings are one big feedback mechanism. It will give you the information you require to live a life that most resonates with you. The tricky part can be listening to the body. First one has to make the connection that the body is able to communicate what is going on and then be willing to hear the message.

Have a headache? It could be because you haven't had enough water or you have tension and are wearing your shoulders like earrings. It could also mean that your skeleton needs some attention and an adjustment. There is also the possibility that you are avoiding thinking about an area of your life and your head is saying "umm, hello?  Hi!  If you use me to address that issue, I will ease up and not have to cramp you like a vise grip squeezing your head. Just a thought. It's what I am here for."

Have heart palpitations? Yes, it could be your addiction to caffeine but it could also be that you are hurting and not allowing yourself to feel all of the emotions because they seem too great. I have personal experience with this one lately. My body was trying to tell me that while I thought I was relaxing and allowing the emotions to flow, I wasn't at the level I was now capable of. Of course, we have to follow due diligence and go to the doctor to have the physical vessel checked, but being aware it is giving you feedback can help to alleviate the issue before it becomes a true medical problem. I am very fortunate, because I won't settle for less, to have a medical practitioner who will hear me when I say that I believe it is emotional and a deficiency of minerals, but we have to check out the ole pumper as well. I am so excited to do the stress test! Talk about tangible feedback!

What this recent visit to communication with my body reminded me is that we have pathways that have been created from previous experiences and if we listen to them, we can shift and really be in alignment with self. The feedback loop that is created is like a great conversation. One being talking.  The other listening.  Then taking turns. What you give in a conversation comes back if you are willing to listen. Truly listen. In a session with someone this is what I do the best, I believe.  I listen to their words, their body, their soul and their energy field. One may not know what is being said by their body, mind or soul and it's my job to help figure that out and then change the pathway that will change the perception that then changes the habit... Exciting, isn't it?

For the sake of practice today, let's stay with the body. What is it trying to tell you?  Do a body scan and see what organs, muscles, bones or systems are talking to you. Yes it will feel weird at first, we have been taught to think of our body as a secondary consideration. A vehicle that gets us to from point A to point B but it is so much more than that. If your car made a clunking sound, you would try to figure that out wouldn't you?

We are quick to jump to a prescription and a diagnosis in this society. What if you listened to the messages and then created a working plan from there? For my seemingly broken heart I could stress out more, demand a prescription and a diagnosis, or I could listen, take steps to change how I was responding to life and accept that this process is not an overnight one and that I can learn sooooooo much by opening my inner ears to hear what my heart needs. It works people, and if you can't hear yourself, that is fine. Locate a practitioner that can help you hear what your body, mind and soul are telling you. Then take it from there. Drive your own feedback vehicle.

Feedback. I love feedback. It is the data that makes my brain so happy, the action my body likes and the acceptance my soul is here to learn.  It is also the knowing that I have the tools to have them all work so well together. So can you.

Grab your toolkit, we are going in!
Vicki


I interrupt the series on understanding Belief Re-patterning to bring you this energy update that is absolutely driving me bonkers because it won't leave my head until I post it. Ever have one of those days? Welcome to my world.

So, since the thirteenth of February the energy has felt like a little kid who was just told their favorite superhero is coming to live with them to be their own personal friend and roommate. Exciting and forward moving and quite frankly a bit freakish in the "whoop this is it" vibration. I'm not sure if that is the technical term, but whoa baby, does it feel like that to me.

I am not your astrological expert nor am I that tuned into whatever dimension we are supposedly accessing for the first time in our human lives but I can tell you that when I get these super excited feelings, I listen. I listen mostly because in the past, I may not have. I would have gone about my life putting out fires, focusing on more production and wondering why in the heck it feels like I am amped up on caffeine when I haven't had that much. I do appreciate the little jolt now though as I am a decaf chic now. However, by not listening in the past, I had to work so much harder than it was necessary. I don't want you to have to work that hard.

As I said, there was a shift around the 13th of February and it seems to be gaining ground. Meaning, that if you have a project you are working on, including yourself, a change you would like to make or an area of your life you have been waiting to start; yeah, I'd get on it. Why not use the natural energy to make some headway and to see some results coming back to you that may just inspire you to keep moving.

I keep seeing the visual of a starting line. All of us stepping up to the starting line of our lives and getting to determine what that means while knowing, absolutely KNOWING, that we have trained, studied and committed enough of ourselves to enjoy success. Of course, it is all going to be relative to what we each want in our lives. You may not want to be on a big stage helping people to shift their beliefs and how they talk to themselves, but I do. I, trust me, do not want to run a restaurant or open a day care or explore the inner workings of a cave in Madagascar....ok, maybe the last one but not as a career or anything.

My point is along with the energy of forward movement is a vibration of "celebrate who you are and shine that proverbial light until everyone needs sunglasses" theme. Isn't that stinking exciting? I am so excited to see what kind of sunglasses we all will be wearing.

This energy can bring about a feeling of what we believe is fear too, but I promise you, if you look at it a little bit closer you will see that it is wearing the old coat of fear and underneath it is a shiny new outfit of you stinking rock! If you need help in finding that outfit, come see me. I know how to find them in all the cool places, usually hidden right in plain sight! I am a matchmaker extraordinaire when it comes to helping people meet themselves.   Don't ask me to pick out a wardrobe though. That takes a totally different eye to which I am so grateful people who can do that exist! I think Garanimals may have been invented for me. :)

We are on a quest, you see. We are all on our own quest to realize we are amazing individuals and the fact that we are different yet all vibe with a heartbeat, is the most beautiful thing about the quest. Howard used to say "the same but different" when describing things to me. It drove me BATTY because I didn't get how that could be, but this appreciating our differences while realizing we  have so much in common may just have been one of the things he was talking about.

If you are reading this, please take the time today to appreciate exactly all it is that makes you unique and then choose one way to accentuate that. It isn't a big head that you will get from the process, it is a big, loving heart you will receive by appreciating self and lining up with this wave of energy that I believe will be here through May. Woo hoo. Then, after you realize how good it feels to really like and appreciate yourself, use that momentum to help someone else see it in themselves.

There will be many starting lines in each of our lives. You do not need to do all of them at once. Pick one that feels the most fun and go with that. If you are experiencing life as a single person for the first time in a long time, be kind to you. If you are leaving one occupation for another and aren't sure you can do it, be kind to you. If you've decided that old patterns are no longer serving you and you will be brave and face the old in order to release them, be kind to you. If you have a wonderful idea for a product but the old voice tells you it's nothing. Listen and move forward while being kind to you. See a pattern here?

Universal energies are very supportive of our path especially since we have contributed to them by wanting something different then what we have had, but they aren't about pushing so fast that it is counter intuitive to our path. The days of cracking the whip for productivity and results are done. Did it every really work long term anyway? Kindness is a much more efficient and Eco friendly energy source.

Use this time of support and excitement to really ask yourself what you would like in your life and then create the plan that will help you get there. Using intuition along with our intelligent brains is listening to the brilliance of this time.

Some people are not going to want to believe you, come along with you or listen. Be kind to them. Some are going to croak because they perhaps can serve best on the other side. Be kind to them.  Some will want to diminish your dreams because their's scare the heebie jeebies out of them. Be kind to them. The theme continues.

You are made up of energy so doesn't it make sense to grab this energy wave and see how well you can ride it? Sure, you may get nervous up there on the crest of it, but perhaps that is the life force energy you have been looking for all along in your own personal caffeine buzz.

What if, just what if...the superhero you want to live with you...is you? Tights optional.

See you on stage,
Vicki


If you've been following the blog for the last few weeks, you know I have taken you through the first few steps of the Belief Re-patterning process; forgiveness, permission and choice. In each of these steps one releases, moves forward and begins to act with intention.

The next stage of the process is the Freedom place. This is a fun place for me because it is where we get to try on what the new belief systems being introduced are. I love action and this technique is so based in feeling that the actions garner immediate results. I also love results. Who doesn't love a good return of data?

When was the last time you actually realized you were free to think, be, and feel whatever you wanted?  Sure, we claim that we can because we are in a free country but most of us hide from our feelings so we never really feel completely open to explore what might be the most amazing place of all... our own potential.

I have said before that the Belief Re-patterning that I became certified in via Suze Casey, the developer of the process, added a tool to my kit that allowed me to be completely present when Howard was going through his last tour of Baystate Hospital. When the nurses and doctors asked me how I could be so calm, I told them I front loaded with the process so my brain was ready and able to handle the information I was receiving and my emotions were grounded enough that I could understand the magnitude of the situation without needing a room myself. That and my daily run through the hood allowed me to be my best self when he needed me to be and to continue it afterwards when I needed me to be.

It has been six months since Howard passed. Six months! That both flew by and feels like it's been years. While I have my moments and man, do I miss my friend, I am upright and taking nourishment as he would say when asked how he was, and I am doing quite well.  I KNOW it has to do with the pathways I created in my brain to support my emotions through this process. That is why I get so excited about it and want everyone to do it and use it in their own lives so maybe, just maybe, we can have peace within and then have that extend out.

Someone said to me today that I was so brave to go through this. Me not having much of an edit button lately, said, well, what other choice do I have? I can't bring him back and wouldn't even if I could, because it is his journey to take. Then I quickly said, you know what? I do have a choice. I could have fallen apart and stayed in my own hurt and disbelief and created a great big bowl of poor me soup, but I didn't. That isn't really my personality anyway, but I was able to act otherwise because I knew on some level that I have a choice in how I feel and I opt to exercise the choice of feeling appreciative.

I am free to feel these things. I am free to recognize the love I was blessed to have and even to know the frustration of being with someone who didn't want to be in this realm anymore.

In the freedom stage of Belief Re-patterning we are able to feel the power of who we are and to try on a little bit more of the self-support it can take to be human. We are free to feel the possibility of life and add that to our own potential for a very successful combination.

There is energy in everything and when I work with a client they will often say at this stage they can feel their energy rising up and practically vibrating. As someone who lives being able to discern all of the vibrations in the universe, that makes me absolutely giddy for others to feel.

Think about your own life right now. Is there some area that you know is not how you would like it to be but you are confused about how to shift it? Or, can you see the possibility but can't get out of your own proverbial way? Then you would love the freedom place. Well, you would most likely appreciate all the other steps too but, freedom would have you feeling amazing. So, let's say it is about your work life that you would like to improve, we may progress this way:
  • "I forgive myself for believing I have to remain in a position that does not support me any longer." 
  • "I give myself permission to release _________" (whatever emotion is keeping you feeling stuck). 
  • "I can choose to stay in the ______ place or I can choose to be excited about new possibilities. I choose to be excited."
  • "I am free to explore the idea of a job that supports me financially, emotionally and spiritually." 
We may use a few more statements in each stage, but this will give you an idea of how it may progress. There are two more steps after this one that affirm and support the new beliefs being created. 

Wouldn't you love to have a method that supports you and creates a calm, supportive way of being?  I would love for you to have that. You are free to have that, I promise. 

I am free to believe you rock, 
Vicki


Given that my blog comes out on Sunday's I could go with the obvious topic of love on Valentine's day but I am making a choice not to. It isn't because I am jaded or don't believe in love, quite the opposite, I believe there is love in everything, however, I don't believe giving it attention one day makes it authentic.

When I realized I was choosing to write about something other than retail love, I decided it was a good time to introduce choice in the Belief Re-patterning I offer.  There are six amazing steps to the Belief Re-patterning technique and all are equally effective but choice is my favorite. Don't tell the others.

Don't get me wrong, forgiveness, where we learn to release the past and permission where we start to develop courage are fantastic, but choice, where we start making conscious decisions is so empowering, I can't help but love the little bugger.

We all have that voice in our head with the not so complimentary vocabulary. This inner critic, as it is often called, is revealed every day to us. It chatters and offers its opinion even when we don't want it. Wouldn't you love to hear the voice that supports you and encourages growth? The choice place does that. Using the statements offered and breathing deep, one creates a new pathway in the brain that can become the default program rather than the previous critic one. A coach on board so to speak.

Think about it in terms of the holiday in the states this weekend. We could choose to be bitter about such an obvious ploy to raise poor sales in February or we could choose to feel grateful that we are are talking about love in the first place. That and the discounted candy after the fact are amazing perks! By utilizing choice in our life, we realize we do have a power in our happiness. By using it in Belief Re-patterning, we create a pathway to be used in every area of our lives.

I believe in what I call front loading, getting in there and creating new pathways in the brain before we are in any state of panic or confusion. The technique is fantastic when one is in those places, but if you do it before, you will have it when life happens. Now that is an act of self love. (ok, I had to get it in there somewhere, you know I did.)

So, if there was an area of your life or a message playing in your head that you would like to release, what would it be? Be honest. What isn't lining up any longer for you. Being dissatisfied isn't a permanent state. It's a way for your soul to communicate to your human self that there is more to life then settling for listening to that voice of less than.

 If you could choose, and you can, to shift it and live with a supportive voice in your head, why wouldn't you?  So, this Sunday, after you eat some full price chocolate, have a chat with self and decide if you are ready to invest in you.

Love the love that is you,
Vicki



We have an amazing ability as humans. We have the ability to choose how we want to experience life. We have wonderful cognitive and emotional abilities that are meant to support us along this ride of life. Unfortunately, we often forget that we have these tools and fail to use them. Perhaps we were never told we had them to use!

I believe my emotions are how my soul speaks to me. This took me many moons to figure out, but once I did, I listen, most of the time. A work in process. All emotions are valid and if we give ourselves permission to experience them, life finds a balance.

One of the steps in Belief Re-patterning is to use permission. Last week forgiveness, a process to letting go of pain and the charge associated to old patterns, began the technique. This week, permission, helps one to move past the ways they may be acting or perceiving themselves. This is where consciously creating supportive emotions begins to happen. Consciously choosing emotions allows the brain to be calm and in time, respond with these emotions as the go to place. Emotions are neither bad nor good, they simply are, but that doesn't mean we can't improve on them and feel good in this life we are living.

During Belief Re-patterning sessions, I guide you through statements and breathing to release beliefs and emotions that are not supporting and to bring in those that are supportive. You get to take the supportive ones with you!  Isn't that great!

What do you feel you would like to give yourself permission to experience?  Permission is about moving forward and creating a life you would like to live in.
  • Do you want to give yourself permission to love you?
  • Could you give yourself permission to feel calm? Learn how to not react? To enjoy life?
  • What if you gave yourself permission to learn a new technique to bring that calmness and love to your life?
Giving yourself permission is such a loving thing to do. Most of us don't take the time to look at what isn't feeling good and needs to shift. For some reason, a lot of the people I work with are afraid to even admit things aren't as great as they could be. Like there is some award or punishment if they looked within and admitted they wanted more. Want more!  Please!

For this week, when you bump up against an emotion that doesn't feel like it supports you, look at it in the eye, be kind and then give yourself permission to release that emotion.   Start there and let me know how you do.

I give myself permission to rock this technique,
Vicki
We don't forgive others to free them, we do it to free ourselves. This week I found myself saying to Howard, "I forgive you for leaving me." It came out of the blue as I was cleaning the kitchen. Just popped right out of my mouth. It must have been ready for awhile in order to come out without thought. I immediately felt a lightness and realized the resentment I had been holding. I know he didn't go anywhere as a soul is concerned, but I promise you, he isn't cleaning the kitchen, walking the silly dog, balancing the budget, oh wait, he never did that, but he did participate in other areas and he was a physical presence that isn't there now.

Anyway, recognizing that my heart was ready to help my brain vocalize made for a pretty peaceful day. 

There are many ways we are hurt by being in relationships with others, including our pets and the world. It's easy to point a finger and say it's all about the other person but we play here too on this planet, so we have to start taking responsibility for our emotions. We have to start honoring the relationship we have with ourselves. 

One way we can feel hurt by others actions is when they leave us.  Perhaps they move out, croak, stop communicating or are ill and need to be in a facility.  Another way is emotional. Someone who is not available to their own emotions can't connect with others and that creates distance.

There can be a spiritual difference between people where it feels like someone has left. We experienced this in our marriage quite a few times. There were times where I just couldn't tolerate where Howard was in his energy and then how he connected his emotions to that. This wasn't on Howard. This was for me to figure out and communicate; or leave. 

We can't insist someone grow at the level that we would like them to.  Some people will try insisting, but the effectiveness isn't there. Each of us has to grow and want to grow at our own pace and it's none of our business if the other isn't interested in what we think. That is their right as well. 

We have been taught that if we feel hurt by someone they are automatically the bad guy or girl. Blame doesn't help in any situation. Forgiveness does. The forgiveness is often around how we think of ourselves as a result of someone's actions. Am I not lovable? Don't I deserve happiness? What's wrong with me that they left? I hear this on a weekly basis from clients and while my empathetic heart strings get pulled, I know it is their brain giving them these messages rather than their heart or soul. 

This is one of the reasons I love using the Belief Re-patterning in my business. This is exactly the type of thinking and belief systems that can be re-wired and adjusted to create a supportive message in the brain. 

This year you will hear a lot about the Belief Re-patterning because EVERYONE deserves to feel good about themselves and I intend to blast that message. Belief Re-patterning is a technique that combines statements and breathing to help create new neural pathways in the brain therefore helping us to live happy and supportive lives. Forgiveness is one of the steps in the process. I know it is the reason that I'm able to walk through the experiences of the last six months with my sanity intact and in appreciation for the process. It is also exactly why I was able to say to Howard that I forgive him for leaving me because it wasn't his leaving that was hurting, it was my belief that he chose to go without me.  I followed it up with a statement of choice in how I could see him as leaving me or how I could see him as completing his journey. I choose to see him completing his journey. This helps my brain and heart move forward. It what I truly believe, but my subconscious was a bit stuck.  It is not now. :)

So, if there's a place within your brain and heart where forgiveness lives and it could use some help in applying itself, without torture, give me a call.

I am free to believe I am right where I am meant to be. I plan to rock this year. I hope you will join me,

Vicki





I have had the privilege of being part of three incredible men's passing in these last ten months. While that may seem like an odd statement to make, it is alas, my life at the moment. It is their path, more importantly and something that makes me think and appreciate whatever I did in my life that allowed me to be in their presence.

When I was talking with the friend who is doing his transition as I write this, I asked him if he knew he was doing the hardest thing in his life thus far. He was facing his mortality but he was also being asked to trust that it was all going to be ok.  He gave me one of his chuckles and a look that I've come to read as "Vicki, I like you, but you are one weird duck."  He said to me last week that I ask hard questions and I could stop that now. I love honesty... and hard questions.

Even if he didn't completely believe it, spiritually, he was letting go and doing the path we will all do one day. It was as he told me how much he was going to miss that he also realized how much he had lived. I won't even try to describe the beauty that was in his face and being when he got that. I don't have words for it. Language doesn't have a description for it.

I am always amazed by the human spirit and the strength we all have. These three men have shown me strength in ways I wish I had seen before a disease process made it necessary. All three guys were quiet, loving, perhaps had challenges with communication, yet funny men. At least I thought they were funny. All three have had profound effects on my life by being themselves. By doing the best they could through this process we call life. All three said the same thing to me during our chats during transition; I hope I told the people in my life I loved them enough. Usually followed with; I don't think I did. Now, I was married to one and know he said I love you a lot so his I was able to assure he had done well. The other two and I weren't exactly in that place of expression until the end of their physical life so I can't say for sure if they said but I know with my entire being that they showed it. I assured them they did by witnessing how many people loved them back.

Can I tell you that the three dudes were in incredibly, mind blowingly high pain, and this was their concern. Did they express that they loved and appreciated the people in their life. The strength it takes to wonder that when your entire being is shutting down rocks my world. I'm not sure I would be that strong. I'm not sure, with who I am today, that I would be wondering that. This is where the major impact comes in. I don't want to be wondering that. I know these guys were doing their process but I am a good student and pay attention to the messages coming at me, especially when it is in threes!

What if we all benefit from these three regular dudes and their willingness to answer the tough questions, not only mine, but of their soul? Let's learn from them and gather our strength to show those we have in our lives that we love and appreciate them. Let's decide that showing we care is a great strength and have the vulnerability they showed, be theirs. I know I wondered after Howard passed if he knew how much I loved him. I could see where I was creating issues for myself because it was obvious I did, but really, only because of the last three years of twenty seven did I have that assurance. Had he passed before that, I know it would have bugged me longer because before then it was hard for me show as deeply as I did, even him, that I loved him. We all have this capacity to wonder and my hope is that even if you don't know my amigos, you learn as well from their courage in talking with me and my open book life policy. :)

I know it can be scary to tell someone how much you care, but take the leap and realize even if they don't love you as much, you just checked off the most questioned item by those who are crossing and that is fantastic.

To the guys that have been such a huge part of my life, I love you infinitely and let's remember your promise not to scare me when you pop in to visit!

Learning to express my greatest self with love,
Vicki


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