"There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them." Denis Waitley
 

This quote showed up on my desk today and while I love words, rarely does a quote stand out so much that I feel compelled to share it. Some of you may be familiar with the is quote but I was not, yet it sums up my beliefs in one short sentence....either accept what is going on or do something about it.

It may come as a surprise to some but I have very little patience for those that want to stay in their story and repeat patterns over and over again. I have HUGE compassion for their process and the angst that can be created, but patience, yeah, that I could use some help with cultivating. It is in fact, one of the aspects that I find least attractive about me. I'm ok with the fact that it is there but I am also encouraged to shift it so as not to be known as the coach who uses a line like Dr. Phil, "how's that working for you?" too often. I love that line but I do feel there is a middle ground of approach that can be more beneficial and loving.

This last year has taught me the amazing power of patience as well as self observation. I have had more a ha moments in the last three months than in YEARS of knowing me. To tell the truth, I could use a break but I'm nosey so I have no doubt I will keep watching for those times when a raise in my own vibration would not only help me, but the situation I am in.

Have you noticed that this year has been very much a "here's your stuff, right in your face, do you see it? good, are you going to acknowledge it or do I have to get louder" year? Not exactly something to put on a calendar and be inspirational but true nonetheless. So, if the energy is helping us to see our stuff, I think it is our responsibility to do something about it.

Now, this stuff could be good stuff too. Maybe you have learned a new skill, developed some self esteem or boundaries. Perhaps you have decided to make changes in your life you have been thinking about for a long time but didn't implement. Stuff can be neutral, neither good or bad but simply stuff. How we look at it determines whether it is what we want to hang on to or let go and after we look at it whether we get busy or not determines whether we are ready to accept responsibility.

Responsibility in my opinion is not blame. It is simply the act of saying, well yes, I did have something to do with that as it showed up in my life and now that I acknowledge it, I can shift it if necessary.

In my book I talk about how to watch our lives like a movie to get perspective because let's be honest, if you keep the emotion in it, the ability to see your part may be a little tricky. So, try this the next time there is a situation in your life that seems to be gathering some drama speed, step back, watch the scene unfold and then respond, do not react to what is going on. Take responsibility for your emotions as well as your actions first and then decide if you even want to engage. Walking away is a perfect response sometimes. In walking away you take a responsible action to not further whatever wasn't going well and help to diffuse any tension.

Then you can decide if there is any action to take.

So, where in your life are you not taking responsibility? Where are you waiting for someone else to fix things, or for something to blow over, or for it to change on its own like little fairies are going to come in and say a magic spell and poof everything will be good? (ok, that might be a bit of an exaggeration but I KNOW you know people who are living passive like that. Are you one of them?)

Once you have identified that one place, make one small step to move forward. Is it your finances? Contact someone who can help. Is it your relationship? Perhaps seek counseling for both of you or for yourself first. Is it your closet? Well, then take fifteen minutes and hang those clothes up. You can do anything for fifteen minutes. I promise you.

Once you have taken a step and accept that movement is what you want take your right hand and reach over your left shoulder and pat yourself on the back. Acknowledgement is fantastic too!

If you aren't willing to accept responsibility then I have one question for you? Insert Dr.Phil's voice "how's that working for you?". If you need help in seeing or accepting, I am here with all the compassion in the world, just don't expect to be allowed to sit in your story for that isn't a loving way to interact and I am so sure you have the ability to grow that I won't join you in your story but I'll be here if you want to write a whole new chapter and include some fantastic acceptance and responsibility to it. It's fun, I promise you.

While this year was in your face year, next year is lining up to be about, what do you want to do with your new found you....soooooo...you might want to get looking for you.

I wish you well on the journey,
Vicki

So what does happen if there is no knot at the end of your rope? What if when you get there it is slippery, your hands (or paws) won't hang on and you find yourself falling, falling, falling?

Have you experienced this? I bet you have. I bet we all have because life is full of moments that are potentially freaking scary and falling, falling, falling, is scary...until you realize that wait a minute, I always bounce. I always get up, find my way, claw back up to the top of the rope where hopefully there is a platform to stand and catch my breathe and maybe contemplate what the heck just happened and how can we NOT do THAT again?

Many times it isn't the circumstance that is happening but rather how you handle it that determines how well you live and how bounceable you really are.

This past  year I have had the opportunity to learn this through my husband's illness. While we navigated the health care system as well as the mine field of emotions that happen with any unknown, I've learned that even though it created some diversion of what we considered our path, it has also given roads that we may not have gotten to so fast. For instance, would I have realized that asking for help is not weakness on my part but rather as much fun for others to help as it is for me? Would we have deepened a relationship that works well or would we have stagnated like lots of couples who have been together for over twenty years?

Learning to be bounceable (admit it, you just had a vision of a me bouncing) also known as trusting is where I learned I had a knot that I just couldn't see. I learned that all the other smaller trials and diversions helped me trust that whatever the outcome we would be ok. I would be able to move forward and look for the next side road that shows up. Sure, it was incredibly scary and tear producing but even that helped me to accept that sometimes things are just hard and that's ok. That knot will always be moving and may be invisible at other times but the knowing that I have it will be the strength that helps me hang on to that rope or cliff or side of the building.

So trust in myself and the universe eventually lead me to the knowing that whatever road we were on, I would eventually find my direction again and my endurance. What is your rope? Is it your faith? Your belief in the universe? Your commitment to working out? Your track record of thriving through some tough times or are  you just developing it now and could use some help in tying your knot.

Ask yourself how you have made it through and eventually learned from past experiences. Also think of when you have seen others hold it together, or not, but move through trying experiences and advance themselves both emotionally and spiritually. What did they do that may inspire you to try?

However you find the knot, create a reminder that you have it. Place a sticker on your odometer, a reminder on your phone, a bracelet or something that says, hey, you have created a safe spot, why don't you use it?

Viewing the journey from ALL the roads offered,

Vicki

Vicki's website

This morning while I was considering what to write I kept hearing this toot toot behind me. It was very playful and it sounded somewhat like a kids toy. I asked what was that about and felt it was to encourage myself to toot my own horn but not just mine, yours too! While it isn't my job to toot someone else's horn, I am quite good at it. As with most people I imagine, it is easier to talk of someone else's skills, abilities and what they have to offer than my own.

When I am talking of someone else's accomplishments both of the physical and spiritual I am quite prolific. Ask me to talk of mine and I will downplay it and act like it's nothing of what I have accomplished. Some of this comes from feeling like it really hasn't been that hard but when I look and really pay attention to where I was and where I am and where I am going, I have a strong urge to go Whooaaaaaa (shout out to Lisa Ketcham who does the best whoa in the world!).  So I wondered, if I am willing to acknowledge it to self and can be reasonably comfortable stating it to others why can't I toot my own horn, which by the way would be one that goes ahuuuuggggaaa, cause it makes me giggle.

Some of it comes from my upbringing. I will always maintain that my parents did the best they could with what they had because the blame game doesn't work in my world but that doesn't mean I can't look at it and be in awe of the progress I have made from that upbringing. In my world it was encouraged to read well, speak well, do for others but not act smart. It wasn't until recently that I realized that is one of what I would call a whiplash message. It spins your head from left to right so fast it gives you a sore neck. Now, I take responsibility for believing that being smart would bother other people but I can also acknowledge that that belief is just not based in truth.

So often what holds us back is stuck in those beliefs and we may not even be aware of what they are or where they come from. Or if we are, maybe we don't want to look at it for fear it's bigger than we think. It doesn't really matter because the solution is the same; being willing to look and being willing to toot!

What beliefs are you hanging on to that you could release so you can root a toot toot with me? What voice do you hear in your head that isn't yours? What messages did you receive that just don't serve you any longer? It is ok to drop them and to allow the new messages to flow in. It really is and if you need help with this, feel free to call. It's amazing to feel like you are in your own skin and that you have choice with life and I, for one, am going to not only toot that I am going to sing it from the rafters! I am going to be the example of a smart person who looks for that next belief that can help her excel and love her life.

So, to get you started, try a few of these statements:

• I am _______________
• I love ______________
• I giggle when _________
• I want to _____________

See what comes up when you use these open ended statements. If nothing is there, that is ok, leave it for later and let it germinate in your being.

My answers would be, at least for today,

• I am loving, funny, smart, charismatic, thoughtful, curious, industrious and enlightened.
• I love the potential in life and in a person.
• I giggle when I have a great one liner that is slightly ironic and hits the point.
• I want to help people feel fantastic to their soul so that they will toot toot toot along with me in the band of life.

It's not that hard and can lift your vibration significantly if you allow it to.

Your challenge for today...... tell someone else what is great about you. One thing, you can do it!

Viewing and tooting and generally enthused with life,
Vicki

How do you know something before you know it?I heard myself ask this of a client last week and thought, hey that's a pretty good line. So often we put intense pressure on ourselves to KNOW what we don't even know yet. The pressure to perform, to be perfect, to be the knower of all information which just is not feasible. I am a true believer that everything is possible but to know everything would not only be a lot of pressure, it would be boring as there would be nothing else to learn, right?

When we are a child people applaud when we learn something new, like walking or finding our mouths with a cheerio. Something people have done for ages and yet we clap for it. Why don't we do this for adults or the older children we expect to have all the information simply because we already do, or do we?

Why don't we celebrate the fact that someone doesn't know but is willing to learn? It seems we have shifted from a place of comfort and excitement in being able to say, oh wow, I don't know but I can find out, to a place of fake it and hope no one sees that you don't know. This faking place not only takes you out of alignment with your soul that came here to learn, it feels awful, mostly because it takes you out of alignment with your soul. Cycles are fun aren't they?

So today when you don't know something, I am going to suggest you say, I don't know but am excited to figure it out. I am also going to ask that you celebrate yourself for being willing to say you don't have all the answers AND for seeking them. Then perhaps you will know something you didn't know before you knew it and feel empowered by the process. There may not be a lot of people surrounding you applauding that you did it, but I promise you, you will know you did and that is more important than what anyone else thinks anyway.

Viewing life as a continuous learning experience,
Vicki

Vicki's website
vicki@vickibaird.com

It is a gorgeous day here in the Berkshires and an abundance of green, sunshine and cool crisp air can be found. There is something about the combination that makes one feel so alive. I am very grateful for not only the opportunity to experience it but the awareness to take the time to appreciate it. This has been a challenge for me for the last few weeks, awareness. I have been both hyper aware and mind numbing unaware. (ok, that second part may be to too many hours viewing House Hunters International but the data is still out on that. )

I had mentioned in my last blog that the energy is a doozie right now and we were in the middle of something amazing and ridiculously challenging at the same time. I  stand by that description today. WOW has it been a challenge to not overreact or to bite someone's head off or to say, GIVE ME SOME SPACE! How about you? Are you feeling the compression of the energy yet? Appropriate that we are going into Labor Day here in the States because I feel like my head is being squeezed through the birth canal again. Luckily, I don't remember the first time and I was happy about that. I am not impressed. I am however completely stoked (can you say that if you aren't a surfer or a pot head? Does anyone even say it anymore? Well, I'm going to. ) about the ushering in energy.

I vacilate between this is so great that I can feel what is coming and man, I'd like to be oblivious for a bit so the pressure cooker will turn down. I'm nosy though, so I would probably always pick the prior. There is no doubt that we are moving to a higher frequency and what that means is both our soul selves and our physical selves need to adjust. If you are finding you are more tired or lack inspiration to do what you would normally do in a day, give yourself some space and compassion and perhaps rest and take care of you for now. If you find you are using the energy as an excuse though, reevaluate why you don't want to do something. Perhaps there is an emotional or a very logical reason you just don't want to do whatever it is.

As I have stated before, I believe there to be a BIG breathe of fresh air, universal, not Berkshire fresh air, September 4th. There is a feeling of great relief at that time and I am using it as a beacon for my sanity. I am asking each day "what can I learn from this" so that the turmoil, one doesn't have a say over me and two, will be put to good use.

Along with this energy is a great deal of sadness. I do believe that it is the purging that we go through as individuals as well as universal collective energy. Hey, we asked for it so it is being delivered. I know there is a supposed Blue Moon and I say supposed because there is so much disagreement in the astrological world about whether it is or not. I say who cares if it is a Blue Moon, a green moon or a moon made of cheese, we have another full moon, just like we do every four weeks or so, to use for our advantage here. The full moon is fantastic for releasing and letting go of what no longer serves us. So, did the moon cycle come first, absolutely, did the energy that is present add to the full moon effect, yup, can we use it our benefit. You betcha baby!

What do you want to release? What is no longer serving you? What would you like to have in your life? Use this cosmic 2x4 energy to help you find that. Write up a list of what you would like to release and then burn it outside to release it to the universe. If you can't burn, a good shredder will do the trick but be sure to take the papers outside to the trash so that the same principle is applied in releasing.

Along with the ushering out of old behaviors, there has been a huge amount of people passing lately. I recognize that it is the nature of my business that I encounter the emotion of loss on a daily basis but there is more of a frequency of souls transitioning lately. You will notice I do not use the word die. We don't die, we transition to another form. Life goes on not only for us but for those that have transitioned. I have seen time and time again where the one who has passed is comforting those of us here in the physical by acknowledging how awesome the process is. Let's face it people, we are all going to transition. The sooner we find a place within us of the gorgeous nature of that, the more fun the physical plane will be.

I know everyone is on their own path and they will come to that place in their own time and it may take passing to get there, but they will and for that I am sure as well as grateful.

Many of the souls crossing are doing so simply because their journey has completed. They have learned whatever they were here to learn and they are releasing themselves to the other side. Not to cease to exist but to learn in a different energy.

There are others that are choosing to up their exit date because they are not all too sure they want to go through the next wave of energy that is coming. Most of the time these souls had a hard time being on the Earth plane to begin with and have had challenges with addictions or mental health issues or plane ole don't feel like I belong energy. Some of these will be at their own hand and some will be at a divine intersection from anothers. There are no accidents and there is choice in everything so let's honor those that felt they were complete or were just so sure they didn't want to do this any longer (suicide, overdose,deliberately putting themselves in harms way) and remember them for their lives and thank them for being a part of yours.

There is also a group of souls that are leaving that will help us to the next level of learning or expansion and as a soul felt they could assist better from the other side. I saw this right before September 11, 2001 as well. So many are leaving here in order to be able to assist in a higher manner.

My point is that each and every passing is by choice and while that is challenging to believe from a human point of view, I hope it brings some comfort to those that are grieving the supposed loss of their friend, lover, parent, child, pet, local hero, sibling, etc. They aren't lost, they are still present and they are still able to communicate. It may take processing through your own grief to be able to feel that but I promise you they are there.

So, while this weekend may be bumpy energetically, why not find the time and space to be with those you love and spend some quality time with them and allow yourself to learn how to LIVE in every aspect of the word. Allow yourself to feel and allow yourself to become clear about what is in YOUR highest interest.

I believe in the strength of all souls whether enjoying their physical life or their non physical life and I believe in the love that is there at all times to be felt. Allow that love to comfort you and allow whatever feelings come up, not just in the next few days, but for your entire journey. I promise you, you will be glad you did. When your energy or your behavior wants to go to complaining or pointing out someone else's faults, take the time to look at yourself and perhaps learn to let go of whatever that anger is and allow the love to come in. Remember, where you put your attention is what you get in return. A little awareness goes a long way.

I do wish you well on your journey here in the physical and to those amazing souls reading this from the other side, I thank you for your teachings for I know it is because of them that I trust this whole process of transition and trust the vice grip will release itself soon.

Choosing to view from the heart,
Vicki

 Vicki Baird website
info@vickibaird.com

Well, how is life going for you? I have found this last month to be an absolute roller coaster of energy, emotions and everything button finding and pushing! Amazing, it has truly been amazing.

I decided a few years ago to not publicize too often the energy that was present and upcoming as some people can't balance the knowledge with allowing. They often want to jump on the drama of it and in turn, creates more and more of the negative wavelengths. I have stuck to this as I didn't want to promote a reason (even though that was not what I was saying) for people to audition for their Oscar performance.

It became very apparent to me this week that I was allowing a few reactions to overrule the positive effect it can have. Sometimes I have a slow return rate but I always get the point eventually!

So this is what I am seeing and feeling in the energy. HOLY SHITTAKE MUSHROOMS as my daughter would say. It is moving so fast that I feel like I am in the white water rapids competition in the Olympics and I didn't even go to the qualifying round or training! While I feel this is all leading to a fantastic awareness of self as well as the how I connect and communicate with others, I am not sure at times I have the fortitude to hang on to the oh shi*t handle on the tube to make it through to the finish line....which keeps stinking moving!

So, if you are feeling like you are on some kind of fast forward button and are having a hard time hanging on to your handle, well, hang on because much like the bucking bronco ride in the honkytonks (isn't that a great word?), the energy will require you to throw that arm up and just move with the motion of the ride and hopefully, laugh like a fool while you are doing it.

The reason for this isn't very glamorous...it just is. We are ready collectively to experience the next level of energy evolution and believe it or not, have been asking for this. We are asking ourselves and others to be more compassionate, we are asking ourselves to connect our soul to our human self in a cognitive and inclusive way and we are now trusting that we can carry out this mission.

Over time we have had some  huge openings and it hasn't been talked about or advertised but we made it through so just imagine if you had a heads up and were able to approach this next one with some reminders to breathe and to trust that if our soul has traveled this far, it will be able to lead us further with some ease and acceptance of self and others.

When will this happen, well, it is already in motion but the culmination feels like it will happen around September 3rd of this year 2012. I find it very appropriate that in the United States we will be celebrating Labor Day as the energy feels like I am going through the birthing process again only remembering it this time. I'm not a fan but I am tenacious and I am nosy and I know you are as well so we will get through this and breathe well after the 5th and well, then it will start up again in November but hey, at least we will have a month or so between sessions.

What can you do to help yourself through this? You can remember to take time to yourself, to be kind to you and to be excited about every challenge which presents itself,  because I promise you, if you are experiencing difficulties they are there to help you clear them before this opening so on the other side of it, the messages aren't big enough to be cosmic 2x4's upside the head!

Another way to help yourself is to say this too shall pass for it will and things will calm and then we will assimilate the new energy and then it will kick up and then it will calm and then we will assimilate.....do you see a pattern here? yup, the same one that has always been there it is just more intense now. Maybe it is because we go so fast ourselves we are adding kinetic energy to the process or maybe it is so we can vibrationally expand and use more of our abilities or maybe it is just the process of life that when we accept that there will be changes and things will go on and on and on. Then we will relax in whatever the energy is...which is really full circle to this post because if you just relax and ride with flexibility, your experience will be fast but it doesn't have to be frenetic.

So, what will you do to get some practices in place before that first weekend in September so when the energy is challenging you, you see it is as a personal request from self to be more than you were and to be proud of yourself?

I am going to keep with the promise I made to myself to walk and bike and breathe and visit with self. This became a necessity when I first started feeling this wave come in as I felt I was going to explode and was so overwhelmed with life where normally I see everything as an adventure. So perhaps you can borrow some of these too or will find your own but whatever happens, I am going to ask you to hold the energy that this is a FANTASTIC thing and that you will be with me in the excitement of the changes happening, rather than add to the fear.

I trust you will be there when I am careening down those rapids or challenging that dang bull for a redo because the view from here is spectacular!!!!!!!!!!!

Vicki

Change really is a good thing. It doesn't always feel that way when you are right in the middle of it but one of the gifts of life is that there is always change. The secret is getting good with it and realizing if it is always going to be there, it may be in your best interest to embrace it.

Now, you can embrace it with the wimpy hug some people give, you can go in with gusto and squeeze the stuffing out of it, or you can greet it like a dear friend, a good squeeze with an honest to goodness happy to see you feel.

I choose the last one for the most part. I feel that if nothing is stagnant then I better be good at going with the flow and recognizing what is in front of me so I can use it to my best interest. I have learned over the years that if I go in wimpy, I freak myself out. I will over analyze, I will be in my head way too much and I will inevitably create an outcome that I really don't want. It is best to see it as an opportunity to grow and to assess where it is I still require some patience.

Recently, I decided if my business was going to grow in the direction I would like it to, I had to start making some decisions and changing how I do business. Basically, it had to grow up. It had to become a business with an intention of moving forward and it needed me to be decisive and not so go with the flow. So there is constantly tweaking in this change process I am realizing for myself.

I also had to stop worrying about how others would be when my business changes and instead be the example of that loving change with grace and humor. My current task is in hiring an assistant. Someone who could be independent in their thinking but get that when I say there is a deadline on something, I'm not kidding and I'm probably not going to hug you when it isn't met. Someone who loved what they do as much as I love what I do and would be willing to grow as my business grows. People say they want to but a lot of the time that is a platitude they are offering because they think that is what I want to hear rather than what they really want.

So, this time the change is being methodical, business oriented and clear about what I am expecting and not being willing to settle because the person is a good soul and just needs a chance. This has been my pattern in the past and it doesn't work, does it? Have you ever giving someone a job, or hung out with them or kept them in your circle because they were a good person but you didn't really align with them? I realized how condescending that was the other day. Like I was the only one that could help them? Please. They have to help themselves and want to and no amount of me wanting them to is going to get anyone anywhere.....and often the job didn't get completed so there was the universe with my cosmic 2x4 telling me, Vicki, seriously, do you want someone to do a job or do you want to offer a safe haven. Ummmmm, option number one please!

I bring this up because often our change involves others around us and the tendency is to hold back on our expectations for desires for a fantastic life while we wait for others to join us. This waiting can lead to frustration, resentment or a really nasty attitude and then who wants to hang with a person like that..except others that know you are really a good soul and they are waiting for you to show up....what a cycle we get into.

I know the person I end up working with will be a good soul, because we all are inherently, but I also know that because I looked at an old pattern and decided to change it that we will match well and not only be productive, but FUN!

Where is there a place in your life that requires some change? What could use a little cleaning up, changing up, fluffing up to where you feel like you have seen change, met change and been excited about it? If you feel some resistance to change chances are you have already grown past it and just don't want to admit it. We have a class this weekend that would help with that...if you are ready for some change.

Take one small step today to address the area you feel could use some change and then celebrate yourself for taking action. It really will feel good to do something about it instead of sitting in the what ifs of it all. THEN you can start creating the life you really want to have.

So, as I sit on my couch typing this is occurs to me I will want to have something written up as I meet with all of the applicants to remind me that I've changed....and it is for the better. :)

Viewing life with new eyes and intention,
Vicki