We, as humans, were given the gift of the expression of emotion. We have a variety of expressions to choose from too. Some of us have short fuses while others have what seems like unending patience. Each persons experience is as different as they are. It amazes me when I see people who are so in touch with their feeling that they can articulate exactly what they are feeling. Sometimes it amazes me that some of those same people don't have an edit button, but I am still always impressed with their ability.

We have all these beautiful feelings and yet we tend to lean toward negating them. We have all had the experience where we ask how someone is and they say fine yet we know they aren't. It may be very clear they are not fine but they feel they have to suck it up and pretend all is well. I agree that there are times where communicating exactly what you are feeling may not be in the best manners but what about those times where it is quite safe to do so and we still suck it up?

I wasn't always comfortable with emotions because in my family we didn't talk about anything, at least nothing of substance. There was anger expressed, frustration and humor, we are a pretty funny family if I do say so myself. Feelings themselves weren't though and that is pretty evident by the sheer number of people in our family with thyroid issues. I decided a few years ago that I was going to clear up my own thyroid and to do this I had to learn to express myself. Goodness. Give me a stage and I am very eloquent, have a client need to express, cry, scream, laugh,  and I am good, ask me how I'm feeling and you were likely to get a fine as well. Challenge me to ask for what I would like and I would deflect with that humor I learned.

Through my process though I have come to really appreciate this amazing barometer we are wired with. Why would we have emotions if we weren't supposed to use them? I asked someone the other day when we were discussing her tendency to diminish her emotions if rather than diminishing them, she could learn to use them.

It made sense to my head that we could negate or navigate. We could continue to deny that we felt a certain way or we could learn to listen and use them as the north star to indicate where we really are. I know our head will tell us stories but our emotions tend to be right on. Just ask a two year old when they don't want to do something. They aren't being particularly defiant because they don't really know what that is yet, but they are following their disappointment and expressing their desire for a different outcome. What if you listened to your feeling of less than and asked yourself what you could do for you now? One of my besties, Laurie Magoon, always says "how can I support you with this?" Can you imagine being on the receiving end of this statement? If you know Laurie, you have been but really, how great is that? (Thank you Laurie if I haven't expressed that enough. This is gratitude I am expressing!)

What if you said that to yourself when you were feeling discord, how can I support me right now? This could be a gps of sorts for you to navigate emotions. First, allowing yourself to feel them, then asking how you could be of support and then doing whatever your brilliant self comes up with. I would suggest it be of your highest interest so while that pint of ice cream may support the craving for sugar, it isn't helping emotions to be productive, it is just adding to another trip around the block on your walk! Perhaps start with the walk! See, you are getting good at this already.

One of the benefits of the Belief Re-patterning sessions that I offer is it can help you connect with those feelings and become comfortable in having them, in a safe place, and learning what to do with them!

For this week, give yourself the gift of honoring the emotions as they come up. They are telling you something, be willing to listen. Be nice to you during this process. Much like learning how to ride a bike, this is going to take a bit of balancing if you haven't been listening previously. Be patient and be aware others may not know what to do with your emotions and that is fine. It is still very valid to have them. Their emotions are theirs to deal with. Perhaps they haven't been doing that either. We will all arrive in that caring feeling space eventually, it is part of the soul journey.

Off to express myself,

Vicki

www.vickibaird.com

One of the things that can be very challenging for people is not knowing where they are going. Let's be honest, I've based a business on helping people to see their own path. So often, what is right in front of us is the most difficult to see. Sort of, as clear as the nose on our face. Go ahead and focus on that probosis, it's not clear is it?  

For myself, it is easy to see where someone is proverbially stuck or heading in a direction that perhaps they aren't going to love. I am sure this is true of anyone on the outside of a situation but when you know you have a pack to turn to, the answer is much more evident. 

What's a pack? Well, it's what one has around them to support their knowledge and well being. This can be people, a belief system, education, skills, pets or nature. The different elements are as eclectic as people are. What is in my pack, may not be on your pack. That's fantastic because it makes it all the more interesting. Kind of like asking the kid in school at lunchtime what his parent packed him and comparing notes of culinary yummies. Maybe trading if the feeling is mutual. 

My pack has my intuitive abilities, my coaching experience, my business background, my seemingly insatiable need to learn, my current study of Belief Re-patterning, a family that supports me even when they don't understand my perspective and desires. I also have a trainer that kicks my butt and helps me learn how strong I am while always asking "isn't this fun?" It isn't always, but I do laugh so I have humor too. I have music and can carry a tune. I also have two squishy pets that adore me. My pack is quite full. 

I wonder, what is in your pack? Have you taken inventory of it recently? Could you do that this week? 

When I first put the pack on Tank, he pranced around so proud. He felt purpose and was willing to show his pack off. 

Wouldn't it be nice if we all showed off our pack like that? He has what he needs in that pack, including treats! 

I am going to ask you to ask yourself what could be in your pack. Then message me via the website, Facebook or Twitter to share what you came up with. We can have a virtual lunchtime together! I am particularly fond of ginger snaps. In case you are wondering. :) 

Do you know if your pack is full, you can do anything? You can! I've seen it. ;)

Pack shopping,

Vicki

 
I have always loved this quote. One of my favorite nieces gave it to me years ago as a wall hanging. Until recently I took it to mean those moments where you are watching your kids and you could just burst with happiness or when you are good surprised and need a moment to collect yourself. A few weeks ago changed that.

I was working out and had my first, and I'd be ok with last, asthma attack. It was a very weird experience. Not just the lack of air going to my brain and lungs but the total standing still of time. While I admit I was scared, I was also very calm and strangely observational about the whole process. Luckily, I was working out with my trainer who ran FAST to get the inhaler and a friend that I knew wouldn't let me croak before my time. Ha!

In the moment all I could focus on was getting air into my lungs and calming my system down when it wanted to panic. I am someone who likes to know she has a say over her body. In having no say there was a sweet moment of letting go that has been very freeing. What if I did croak in that moment? Well, I would definitely haunt people because I could, but honestly, I was ok with my process. I was ok with who I was. I would have liked to have run a full 5k and maybe kiss the kids again but as a soul, I was good to go. There is something freeing in that. Now, I get that I have a whole different perspective of the passing process than most but in that moment where I couldn't do anything but focus on breathe in, breathe out, I was good with me. Who woulda thunk an epiphany felt like a bronchospasm?

Now, obviously, I didn't croak or I would be a ghost writer. Ha! Come on, that's funny! So, I decided today to look at that experience a bit more and yes, I did call the doctor. I discovered more than the realization that I was good with me, I discovered I had more questions (no surprise there. I am a nosy soul.). Here is a few of those observations and questions that came up for me. Feel free to play along and see what resonates for you and what doesn't. No need for you to stop breathing too!

 Nothing really matters if you have air. Seriously, if you don't have that, don't move forward to the next thing on your list of things because it will only matter for a few seconds. The gift of a deep breath is one that leads to healing on every level. Go ahead and take a deep one right now.

• Where can you not breathe in your life? Is there an area that you could use some room around? Address it and feel the relief of life giving oxygen.
• Do you have support? Do you have a Justin who will run (with his own asthmatic lungs) to get you the tool that will help you breathe? Do you have someone that will say, listen, I love you but you need to address this area? No, then find that support for yourself. It could be a coach, a meditation, a class, it doesn't matter just find that tool that can help you feel like there is room to expand in your world and lungs!
• Are you open to help? If someone presented you with a tool, would you be able to recognize it or would you stand in your stubbornness and refuse to accept that help?

Fear is ok and you will be ok! In that moment of not being able to catch your breath around whatever is going on, know that you will be ok.

• Look back at other times when you thought you wouldn't make it through the day and then you did. See, you have proof that you will be ok, in time. Being scared isn't a bad thing and knowing you will catch your breath is priceless in moving through the tough times. Sometimes fear is the very thing that gets our butt moving and making a change.
• Even if you croak, you will be ok. You'll have to trust me on this one, but I promise you it is true and one of the things I hear the most is how amazing the other side is and that they wish they spent more time in the present and less time worrying.
• Giving in is not giving up. Sometimes we just need to throw those hands up and admit we are scared before we can do anything to change the situation. The secret is to not sit in the fear and get addicted to the drama of trauma.

You can and WILL move forward. Humans are amazingly resilient. We tend to forget that in moments of stress, but we are. Believe in that resiliency and you will do amazing things.

• The human body is amazing with the ability to heal itself. I'll admit to having a tough time with this belief over the last two days when I found myself unable to run a simple lap post seize up. Now I know that any negativity I place toward my body makes it more difficult to heal, but in the moments after with the feeling of weakness, my perception was failure. Luckily I had friends encouraging me to keep going and eventually my body heard the message. Maybe not at high speed, but it kept going. That is amazing. A few months ago I would have given in but something developed over those months allowed me to keep going. We ALL have that ability.
• I believe having a plan is what helps us thrive in times of challenges. It doesn't have to be a firm plan but it does have to be there. I call this the paver plan. One thing at a time. One paver at a time so you have somewhere to put your foot, one after another. What can you do right now that freaks you out a bit but still feels exciting at the same time? Choose that and take a small step. Don't forget to do the happy dance after!

This morning I heard a message in my head but not from my head. It said "if we all wait for greatness, nothing would ever get done. Go for it. Be amazing!" In light of the recent few weeks where I had to face my own self judgment and move through that to this last weekend where I not only reached a respectable personal record in a 5k, I did it with the joy of self-support. I gave myself encouragement and most importantly, self-acceptance. Even if I didn't beat my last record, I was out there giving it my best. THAT is what counts in my personal book. J

Give you your best. You deserve it and you may just realize that you like that ability to breathe deeply and feel all the room to expand in those lungs and the universe!

Come be great with me….I double dog dare you!

Running this life with all the air I can,

Vicki